Some years ago I had a friend who was getting married and she wanted to perform her marriage but it was in a different State. I determined that I could legally do so as long as I was an ordained representative of an organized religion. So...... I formed "The Church of The Rico" pursuant to the laws of the State of Oregon and ordained myself as "The Rico". I figured the faithful needed some Rico Rules to live by and a statement as to what Rico disciples believe. The following are excerpts from The Book of Rico and the Articles of Faith of The Church of Rico.
THE CHURCH of RICO
THE BOOK OF THE RICO
Chapter 1,Verse 1.
Thus sayeth RICO: “And verily, verily, I say unto you, go forth in sin and multiply, that thy days upon the land may be many”.
Chapter 1, Verse 2.
Thus RICO begat many and multiplied. And RICO said: "It was good".
THE FOURTEEN ARTICLES of FAITH of The CHURCH of The RICO
1. We believe in Rico, and that He is not “God like”, He is a God; that Joe is “Jesus Joe”, and Joshua is “the Archangel Joshua”, our disciple warrior and tormentor to the hippies, downtrodden, drunks, vagrants, hobos, riders and owners of Japanese motorcycles, gen-Xer’s, Millennials, and all other degenerate and disenfranchised of the world.
2. That all womankind, regardless of class or status, shall worship Rico, and , that all mankind shall wish they were Him.
3. We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and should therefore have a good time; but when Rico does it, it is not a sin, and good looking women cannot sin.
4. We believe that through the Atonement of Rico, all womankind may be saved through obedience to the laws and ordinances of Rico.
5. We believe that the first principles and ordinances of Rico are: first, Faith in Rico; second, thou shalt have no other Rico's before me; third, American made motorcycles rule; fourth, baptism by fire; fifth, the laying on of hands in the pursuance of the things you are to be saved from in #3.
6. We believe that a man must be called of Rico by prophecy, to preach the Gospel of Rico and administer in the ordinances thereof.
7. We believe in the same organization that existed in the early religions, namely: Rico is in charge.
8. We believe in the gift of the use of tongues, prophecies of Saturday nights, revelation by strippers, visions of beauty, healing of broken hearts, interpretation of a woman’s needs, and so forth.
9 We believe the word of Rico as far as it is understood correctly by mere mortals; we also believe in the embodiment of Rico as a God.
10. We believe all that Rico has revealed, all that Rico does now reveal, and we believe that Rico will yet reveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of Rico.
11. We believe in the literal gathering of riders of American made motorcycles, and in the restoration of the 1%ers to their rightful positions of power; that Zion will be built upon the site of Rico's Shop; that Rico will reign personally upon the earth; and, that the earth will be renewed and receive its paradisiacal glory.
12. We claim the privilege of worshiping the Almighty Rico according to his dictates, and ask the same of all womankind. Let them worship Rico how, where, or when they may desire.
13. We believe in being subject to The Rico, kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in that order of authority, and in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law of Rico.
14. We believe in being successful, having fun, that riding American made motorcycles is the highest form of worship of Rico, and in doing good to all women; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition: “Why can’t we all just get along”. We believe we can do anything, we hope to have all things, that we have put up with a lot of crap, and will be able to put up with anything you think you can dish out. If there is anything you can do to, with, or on a motorcycle, we seek after these things and can do them better.